september now

time for all the work to begin. yesterday while trying
to hang up tangled wires i slipped a metal disc
too close to my soft index-finger-skin
and sliced right through the white first layer
to inside, wherever it is that blood comes from.

i survived. i survived, but it was frightening,
to suddenly not be a whole body anymore,
to be shaky hands and veins pumping blood
gathering under the skin, pulsing, darkening
while trying to heal, a little raised finger-flap.

it is september now and time for stability.
i am getting used to some of the growth
and it feels less alien to be my own 
unwhole self, somebody who lives
in a place which will turn bloody soon
when the fall leaves come, will survive,
will survive even this year, this blood.